::The Good, The Bad, The Ugly::

I think it'll be best to work in reverse.

The Ugly.

Today was a really bad day for my family--us in this house. My brother was set off again. I can't share many other details--as Mum doesn't want anything said, yet--but I really, really hope that he is getting the help he needs now.

The Bad.

I am still sick with the Infectious Kyle Disease. It's like the flu, without the ohmydogI'mgoingtodie! part. I feel bad for Kai--it's been a month now for him. Because of stupid, stupid Saro-chan.

But the excruciating sore throat did not stop me from screaming earlier. Surprisingly.

Now, all of my medications are starting to work less and less. I'm not crippled like I used to be, but it's pretty bad. I am not falling into a pit of despair like I used to, but my thoughts are more bitter than I know they should be. And I still cry for no reason.

I'm hoping the solution is summer.

The Good.

On Friday, I had an appointment with my financial aid counselor at CSUMB. That meant an automatic visit with Kai. But first, the meeting.

My semester bill will look something like this:

Tuition: Something around $2100

Housing: $2720

Meal Plan: $1475

And guess how much the grants will cover? Everything. All I'll need is spending money. That is crazy!! Mum and I were in shock. Still, Mum starts smiling and when I ask, she tells me this is why. It's such a relief.

So, after the meeting, I got to see Kai. Yay! We did what we normally do, our awesome Kai/Blue stuff. Which is a totally weird sentence. Anyway. I checked my email. Who was it?

LUISCAMARA.

Said with a dramatic accent, of course.

Kai and I met up with him so I could give him his son's hat (another happy kitty!) and then we just talked. Randomly. On the sidewalk.

AND THEN THE MOST AMAZING THING HAPPENED.

Friday was the last day of Script Frenzy. I had 35 pages to write in nine hours. It doesn't sound like much, but it is.. pretty huge.

It was a long struggle.

At exactly 11:58pm, less than two minutes before time was up, I saved my PDF; I HAD REACHED 101 PAGES!!

So that was my exciting.. Friday. Hm. I should get a life.

Love and other indoor sports (monkey-hunting!),

Blue Disastrous

::Mm, Brains, How Tasty..::

Welcome once again to Zombie Blue's blog. Thanks for reading.

Being a mostly-homeschooled childling, I have the freedom to do my work whenever, and the freedom to totally put everything off otherwise. Because I don't have specific times I MUST go do that important paper on Victorian Poetry, I have gotten my sleeping schedule WAY off track. Hence the zombie feeling. Yesterday/today I stayed up twenty-three hours, then took a nap for five and a half. Woo. Still, zombie-like.

So, updates. I have six books to ship out to people requesting them, and I'm waiting for mine. It is really odd, to me, that people like these types of books, but I suppose if my mum has bought them, other people out there can share that taste in books.

I am STILL shocked about my grants. I keep logging into CMS and looking at my Financial Aid page. I feel like I have Jobberknolls flapping about in my tummy. Is it silly to keep checking it? I doubt it would mysteriously vanish..

So, Mr. Toptop the blue laptop had an adventure today. He traveled in the car! On my lap in a small space, but I could tell he was excited. I mean, his battery life actually lasted a lot longer than it usually would.

I decided to go along with my mum and my uncle to his radiation appointment today for the first time, because my grandma had over her sister and an old friend. Eva, Delores and Gladys. Tell me those DON'T sound like stereotypical granny names. Anyway, they were chattering about and laughing like old hens, so, no thank you. I would rather sit out in a car for half an hour to an hour. Which is what Mum, Mr. Toptop and I did.

It was good, I got to write more to my screenplay freely without distraction from the internet. Maybe I should go to Borders or something more often, and not use their wireless internet. Though, books would probably snag me then. Darn. Coffee shop? I can wear all black (wow, such a stretch from what I usually wear, right?) and pretend to be one of those super cool people you see in the movies who appear so untouchable because of their awesomeness, but then they turn out to be the unfortunate, moody, misunderstood people whose lives are only full of bad things..

Um. No. I don't think so.

Anyway, I've written up to the first main point in my screenplay. Finally. It seems to have taken forever. But now is when I need to start really thinking, how can I build up the structure of the plot? How can I neaten it up, and make it have more impact? One thing I need for sure, though, is to know some ways a person can torture herself.

Oh, yeah. Writing this and not being scared? It'll be a ball.

Love and other indoor sports (oh, don't laugh),

Blue Disastrous

::Another Perfect Day::

Well, maybe not absolutely perfect, but pretty close. I spent the day with Kai, mostly in his dorm. Little bit in the lobby.

Meh. It was a really lazy day. First thing we do when I arrive? Sleep. Nine thirty is too early for us night owls. Anyway, we spent some of the time after waking up just laying and randomly.. being us. Which included totally ignoring his stupid さろ roommate who forgot his stupid key and banged on the stupid door for ten minutes straight.

Our story: we were asleep. Yeah. I promise.

Anyway, the day was spent making my blue/black mill deck better, learning some kanji (almost none of which I even remember now) and being totally pissed and therefore writing another two pages to my screenplay by texting it to my email while I was in the place.. situation.. whatever it was that was sucking the happy right out of me.

ENCOURAGE, please.

So now I.. am writing. Yay, I've reached all of.. six pages. So lame. But at least I'm filling out the plot and adding ideas in, thanks to Vince. And it's funny, because I've been talking of killing off characters in my screenplay but.. it wouldn't really apply to my script with current changes. So. I will stick to killing them off in my mind!

Yeah, Blue, that doesn't sound psycho at all..

Also, new music. That's all.

Love and other indoor sports (like balancing four awkward drinks in awkward bottles),

Blue Disastrous

P.S. I have had the craving for a jar of baby food all day. Strawberry banana applesauce. WHY?!

::Thank POODLES::

FINALLY I have caught up on blogs. It has taken that long to get through all the entries to all the blogs I have subscribed to from that one random.. one-week period? Er, the time when I was away from Blogger for a while. Yeah.

But no, I am not the type to just skip over all those entries. I won't ignore the all the work put into blogging, because obviously I blog too, and it means a lot to me when people take the time to read. (Though I'm not sure why, I don't say anything so interesting..)

You know what I find interesting? When I take a break to go to the bathroom, as I am unfortunately a human, and I get back to about six messages with a couple asking where I've gone. I was only gone a minute! Honestly.. Yes, I do love my people. Which is why I'm known for texting back immediately. Weirdness.

Happy Zombie Cria Day! Yesterday, that is. Was. Of course I am sitting here eating my purple Peeps (one has a random eye on its head) and dark chocolate and all. But also, I am enjoying my bright hair.

I would post a picture, but I want to wait for something better than what I currently have. So ha. But it is extremely similar to Jeffree Star's.

..Oh.. my.. dog.. I totally refreshed my Blogger homepage to find a bunch of new entries. Lovely! I shall read them now.

*Later*

So, I read them. Do I regret it? Yes and no. One particular entry brought up an old issue and while I do think of it often, I do shove it aside and purposely forget it. Now I am not. But moving on.

Saturday was fun. Vince and I walked a long way, first stopping at a field over overgrown bushes and yellow flowers. It was pretty cool, but I was kind of afraid a random creature would pop out and eat me. So on we went, until we got to that one side of Schulte, with the ditch with a "creek" and all those trees and whatnot. Turns out, there were no dead bodies. I was shocked.

We spent a few hours there, experimenting with what I will call "photo art". We both semi-failed, but we did get some good shots out of it.

Anyway, we ended up taking off to the mall when two raccoons scared the artistic vision out of me. So, to the mall! To Hot Topic! To Best Buy! To the World Market!

Only, Mum and Grandma were there. We were not supposed to go anywhere they were, as they were getting Easter surprises. We snuck around like creeps. Vince ended up getting tea (which smelled nasty; I forced him to stay away a bit because it was so bad), and then we decided to leave. Only, Mum was near the entrance. For sure we were going to get caught. So we crouched down, weaving in and out of displays, and darted out the door. Only one of the ladies at the counter saw us.

Right outside we were stopped. Ho. Shat. Before she could say anything, we both started half-shouting, "We didn't steal anything! We didn't steal! We have nothing! We were trying to not be seen by someone! We don't have anything! We didn't steal!" Things like that. Vince even offered we turn out our pockets. Like Snape. Or something.

But then the lady says, "No, I just wanted to know what you got." Gesturing to his tea. Sure, lady. I'm sure that's exactly what you wanted to know. Two dark teens darting out of a store, suspiciously glancing over their shoulders to see if they were being caught (by Mum)? Sure, lady.

Yesterday was interesting. I woke up at a somewhat-normal time. But of course, I immediately felt ridiculously sick, and I fell asleep on the couch right after looking through my Easter basket. Which was awesome, by the way. Stuffed full of socks, dark chocolate, purple Peeps, my traditional Long Ears chocolate bunny, a dark bunny, and my own set of adorable ceramic measuring spoons. And a llama! Another for my family of llamas.

I woke up later to find my Aunt Connie and Erica had just arrived. Yes, I know saying "my Aunt Connie.." should be grammatically incorrect. But I mean they are MINE, so ha. Not just a general "this is my aunt, this is my cousin". Meh, whatever, now I'm just rambling.

Very shortly after, I took a shower while Erica gave everyone haircuts. Then it was my turn. The whole day was consumed by hair stuff, catching up, and watching the Blindside while eating dinner. All in all, a good day. And yes, I am eating the leftovers now! Delicious, tender pork.. Oh! Yum!

It is now five days into Script Frenzy, and I am still on page three. Today, I am supposed to be on page seventeen to be on track. Well, ha! Take that, goal! I am going to feign failure, and come out victorious after all!

Well, I can only hope.

Still, deaths, car crash, Lulu, abusive father, mental scars.. Nearly to the first mention of Adrienne hearing a guiding voice. The story is totally taking on a life of its own, and it is way warped from my original nightmare. It is truly amazing.

As well as the human mind. That is all I shall say about that.

As of now (well, when I post this entry), I shall be whoring my blog. Who wants to follow, ne?

Love and other indoor sports (like.. Paso Doble?),

Blue Disastrous

::Another Day::

This has been a week or so of me being ridiculously sick. And it is just that--ridiculous.

Last night I got absolutely no sleep due to being freezing with a mild fever, nausea, headache, and just about every part of my body cramping up from the cold. And yes, I did have three blankets and an additional electric one on. Stupid.

I did get sleep, though. After three. I was waiting for Mum so I could buy.. Mayhem tickets! I'm really excited. Hopefully Kai likes his birthday gift, nyan?

Anyway. I woke up around.. nine? Ate a small dinner. Wrote two more pages on my screenplay. Now I am only six pages behind. Woo! I'll catch up.

My main stopping point was where my stopping point always is--the first time a character's name is brought up.

After hours of consideration, I decided my heroine is Adrienne, her fiance is Will, and her nearly irrelevant white rabbit is (was) Lulu. Only the first two are important, though.

So far, I think it has a lot of impact.. It even sort of freaks me out. I am reliving a cauchemar, after all. Hehehe. I like that word better than "nightmare".

Anyway. Four pages, two deaths, a car crash, two flash backs and an abusive father. Four pages. One of which doesn't even really count.

So you decide.

Anyway, I just finished my ice cream and I am TIRED. So goodnight.

Love and other indoor sports (like, maybe a typing race?),

Blue Disastrous

::Fail.::

That's right. DevianTART has changed everyone's avatar to Team Edward, Jacob, Gaga, and Seeker (no, not a cool Harry Potter Seeker, one of the stupid "seekers" from Twilight).

Sigh. Joking aside, today is the first day of Screnzy.

..AND I'M ALREADY BEHIND.

Of course. I'm only on page one.. of three. Three! Three and a third pages are all that is needed per day in order to reach the goal of one hundred pages. I'll make it up tomorrow, I swear..

Today it really sunk in (well, to my mum, really) that I will be graduating in a couple of months. So what does mum do? Calls the Super Team of us Brown women (and Wray, shh!) to start planning a party. Cake!! I've asked Via Coma to come play, and grab some food and such, so we'll see about that. Also, I have made my list and I'm checking it twice.. I am Sandy Paws, after all. I hope it will turn out to be a somewhat-non-boring party. I know nothing about parties.

Hm. I am very excited. First off, I've plans, and that never happens!! Er, actually, I've said that for the past few months and life is proving me wrong, so I'll keep on saying it.

Anyway. Slight chance of seeing Vince again for a test, and for.. awesomeness. Duh. Twin vibe.

Possible chance at maybe seeing my Fetus Buddeh?

Sunday, my cousin and aunt are coming over, and I'm getting bleach and colour, FINALLY!!

And then will come working hard on schoolwork and my screenplay and seeing Kai and somehow fitting sewing in somewhere.

Also, I like bananas.

And questionable Chinese food. And now I must change rooms.

--

THAT took a VERY long time. Forty minutes. But I did other stuff as well. Random stuff. Like noticing the towel on the real rack smells like my cat after rain (not awful, no matter how bad it sounds). And taking my measurements.

I'VE SHRUNK.

Before::36-27-36

Currently::34-26-33

How'd that happen?! However, I like it. Now, if only to get those numbers nice and even.. Almost there. And don't call me crazy! I'm not complaining. Just want to shape up. And do it well. So ha.

Anyway, I think it is time to get back to writing Tunnels. Which is the official unofficial title. Now it is technically "tomorrow", so now I've got to get to six and two-thirds pages before next midnight strikes.

Wish me luck.

Love and other indoor sports (like bed-dancing),

Blue Disastrous

P.S. Bed-dancing is not the same as the aforementioned "Love".

P.P.S Kai still hasn't written since he's been back.

P.P.P.S. This makes me a very sad kitty.

P.P.P.P.S. Also, I've been awarded a Cal Grant and I can't believe I didn't mention it!!

P.P.P.P.P.S. Apparently I like the whole "P.S." thing.

::So Quickly::

Today::

+Cutting of fleece. Lots of cutting.

+Tiredness. Rest on the couch after said cutting.

+Script Frenzy. It is coming up, I read some script-writing resources.

+Series proposition. Ten episodes in twenty days with Zak. Preparation for Screnzy.

+Magic. Kai. Ho shat.

+School tomorrow.

Goodnight.

-BD

::Ugh::

Life is dreadfully unfair. For many reasons. But my story now is only to say I've been sick for over a week with something that Mum is convinced is the flu. The normal flu, the one that has actually been proven to kill more people per *enter number of daysmonthsyears*. I've missed so much on-site school that I'm going to have to work my ass off to just get back to where I was.
Anyway.
I vividly remember something that was said that was distinctly funny, but now I can't remember. That's what happens when you sleep through literally two days.
Why are people--characters--on soap operas so naïve? Like Amanda on All My Children, who is literally about to be able to use that phrase, as she believes David will miraculously let her go to her husband if she has ANOTHER one of his demon spawn. And Kristina--ugh! She! Is! So! Stupid! I swear, I could kill her happily (in my perfect soap opera world where I love in my head) and move on with my life on the next beat. She not only stays with her physically, emotionally, mentally, and sexually abusive boyfriend (who is also so controlling and stalker-ish that it's just psycho), who she is convinced just loves her, but she also thinks that if Michael tells his dad that Claudia ordered the hit on him that took a year from Michael's life, their dad will call the police like a good man. Um, yeah, a mob boss who is over-protective of his children? He's not going to call the police. He's going to personally kill his new wife without another thought. Even if she was innocent. Which she's not.
So there was my little rant of the day.
What else? *thinks* Well, Grandma is hoarding all the Halloween candy for the trick-or-treaters, so Mum had to go get two bags of Snickers to make up for our lack of candy. Also, our fridge/freezer died. So now we have no food (except soup and whatnot).
The Harry Potter soundtracks, for all the movies (except the sixth, I don't have that one), are really dramatic. Like you expect every second, something bad is going to happen. It's really intense. I feel on-edge.
Speaking of Harry Potter, I'm on page 572 of the Goblet of Fire (again). And listening to the soundtrack with it makes me want to go back in time to see it in Imax again, when we were in the front row and the theater was FREEZING and it was like we were right in the movie. It was amazing. I can't wait for the seventh book movies. I'm going to dress for them. Hufflepuff all the way! The real question, though, is whether to stick to the real costume (er, from the movies), or to interpret it and make a gothic lolita version. It would be cute, and I'd be more likely to wear it than the real costume (er, parts of it), but it might just look too costume-y.
Ahaha! Introducing Colin! Tis funny. Whenever I think of Colin, I think of a small nine-year-old boy, though even when we first meet him, he is eleven--and always, of course, a year younger than Harry. Which is really hard to believe, since Rowling really makes it sound like he's eternally a nine-year-old.
*facepalm* Oh geez. Dueling Club. Remember Lockhart and Snape dueling? Yeah! It was great. Though the snake that came from it (well, Draco fighting a bit later with Harry) "attacked" a Hufflepuff. I'm really taking notice of what happens to all my Huffies in the books now. And frankly, there aren't enough of them. Though there are a LOT that are Sorted into Hufflepuff every book (well, every book that has Sorting in it).
What's up with everyone thinking Hufflepuff is the wimpy house, anyway? Sure, some of the students in it are wimpy, but they shouldn't tarnish the whole House's reputation. And really, other than that, the only other mention is when Harry meets Draco (not Sally--hah!) in Madame Malkin's and Draco says something like he'd die if he were Sorted into Hufflepuff. And come on, it's Draco--who, in the book, is very sexy, and in the movie becomes somewhat unattractive more and more--can we really trust what he says? No, we can't. Or we shouldn't.
Plus, we have Tonks! Or, we had Tonks.
Sigh. I'm still thinking a lot about which novel I should write for NaNoWriMo. I'm still heavily leaning on Metempsychosis, which is the novel I have in my NaNo profile, but my other ideas are just.. I really wish I could write five novels in one month and not go completely insane. Maybe if I somehow write the first in a week, I can go to the second. Then the second in that week, the third. Then finishing the third in that week, the fourth.. and the fifth squeezed into the last--oh, two days.
Yeah, that's what I'll do.
My order, then:
-Metempsychosis
-Untitled zombie apocalypse novel
-Murder City
-Someone is Awake
-Untitled novel about parallel universes
And then in April will come Tunnels--first the writing, and then the actual filming--for Script Frenzy.
Oh my. Scary-sounding drama.. must be--I was right. The Spiders. From Chamber of Secrets, which, if you couldn't already tell, I've been listening to the whole time.
Anyway, NaNo. Yeah. I need some more characters, and a bit stronger plot for novels 1, 2, and 5. The others each had a short but dedicated period of time of obsession, so those are completely thought-out, though somehow the others have more importance to write first.
I'm kind of excited for Screnzy, though, since I'll actually film Tunnels--though it kind of freaks me out to see that come to life. I still have a scar from the dream it came from, so.. Amped-up scary horror dream on film? And I'm probably going to be playing myself--come on, low-budget film? Yeah. I can't afford to pay good actors who will act like I want them to. The other, like, two characters (not including the mutilated corpses) can be played by friends/my love, since they'll listen to me.. hopefully.
Afterall, Kai hasn't texted me once in writing this. Which has been half an hour. Which was after another half an hour of not hearing from him. So, kinda sad. But he's busy. As always. Oh well.
Not to dwell.
Oh, goody, a plane is kind of crashing on TV. Which is one of my greatest fears, along with elevators and being slowly murdered and Kai dying.
Enough of that--I must bother my teacher for the work I've missed.
And I smell Dublin Iceland's ice. For some reason. Which makes me really, really miss skating.

Love and other indoor sports,
Blue Disastrous