::Unsaved Spreadsheets::

My title is referring to the few spreadsheets I have open right now, making lists for random courses and schedules and all that stuff. Lists are your friends!

Oh, dear. My brother is once again making a lot of noise in the kitchen. He better not throw out the Chinese food (it does feed my soul); he can rid of the cake I made, though.

So last.. Er, last last night I decided to finally make a cake. Not from a box. It took a long time to make, including the buttercream frosting, but it was way fun. Everyone in the house thinks it's yummy.. except me. The frosting is too sweet (you know I like sugar--this is too sweet in a bad way) and the cake tastes too much of flour. Of course, I am sick (thank you, love) and so everything tastes weird as hell. But not the Chinese food. Chinese food is ALWAYS good.

So. So! Are you two, like, boyfriend/girlfriend? Steady dates? Lovers?

Yes. Aaanyway. Some updates::

+Finished English with a 91

+Still on page 35 of my screenplay

+My Chemistry course even stumped my uncle, who took 8 semesters of it in college

+Another 2 books were received (Paperback Swap)

+My fear of needles now only extends as far as the ones that go into veins for some medical purpose

+I was given a symbolic knife by Diana, a relatively new friend

Not much else has happened. I really can't wait until I finally have something to blog about, instead of these mundane things that come about from only leaving the house three to six times a month.

AUGUST AUGUST AUGUST.

Or even summer. I'm not really picky. As long as I'm out. Cheers.

Love and other indoor sports (like the inevitable tripping),

Blue Disastrous

::OH My Dog::

But not a Big Fuckin' Dog by any means.

Where to begin, where to begin?

Yesteryesterday my mum randomly is like, "I think I want to go to Monterey tomorrow."

And so we went. Obviously--this was a Kai visit. Sadly enough, from 9 to 11, then maybe 3 to 7, we were asleep. It was a truly lazy day.

I do love spending time with Kai, even if we are being crazy weird--especially if we're being crazy weird. And oi! I actually beat him. Yay for a shiny Mill deck!

After a point we just wanted to get out. Get a grilled cheese like a Sim's aspiration gone wrong. Only, there were people in the lobby, so that is where we went after obtaining said grilled cheese. (There were no napkins or paper towels to speak of, so I had to soil the wolves howling on Kai's knees--which totally doesn't sound awkward.)

You know, I'm really getting to like these lobby-people. Today I saw most of the best, and none of the worst. Speaking of, Kelly is very kind. She baked Kai a late-birthday cake. Nyan.

In all of her niceness, and the cake's niceness.. it was Funfetti. And so, the spiteful baker in Blue is moving on.

Yes, Kai, a cake can be made without any cardboard to speak of.

Of course, in this newfound need to learn to bake from scratch comes the rest. I'm adopting Mum's tradition--or Ken and Laura's, more like--which is, basically, to try a new recipe EVERY DAY. MWAHAHA. Yes, love up the evil laughter. Anyway, this is most likely going to lead into planning full menus every two weeks. Just like Mum. And Laura. And Sara.

That said, if anyone has any particularly tasty recipes they'd like to share, it would be appreciated. Printed and cooked, and then appreciated.

On the note of paperful needs, the screenplay is now a few pages longer, thanks to Chuu. Annoyingly, Chuu only likes to send messages shorter than 130 characters, and so Chuu spammed up my email. Ahh, Chuu..

Summer is coming. Quickly. It's scaring the hell out of me. Less than a month, and I'll be done. I hope. I may need to rely on the help of Magical Decision Dime and Magical Empty Weird Tiny Plastic Cup, but at least it'll be over with, nyan?

AUGUST.

No. I take that back. Orientation, then Mayhem/Blue's Birthday, and THEN August. Maybe with some form of camping trip or beach B&B stay injected in there. Tis a good plan, nyan?

Garble warble didgeridoo. Yeah, I went there.

Someone please sort out this mind.

Love and other indoor sports (made for you, me and the creepers),

Blue Disastrous

::I'm Up Anyway::

Wowie wowie wowie, I have oodles of poodles to catch up on.

On the agenda for toni--this morning, so I don't forget.

+Du'Pont outing

+Relationship issues

+Screnzy

+Mental issues

+School

+My dad

+Lastly Dick Clark, just because

Are you ready? Here we go.

Du'Pont Outing.

So, on Saturday I went out to Tracy to meet up with my twin to go over some Chemistry. Woo. Fun, right?

Mum and I were late. Pathetically late. Luckily, that got me out of meeting Vince's dad (sorry, Vince), so that was all good. So, as we park, Vince comes over and tries to open the door. Which was locked. MWAHAHAHA.

We all went into Barnes and Noble, because where else is better? Nowhere. Duh. But then we had to have a random lady bring a random table to a random place so I could plug in Mr. Toptop. Because, of course, I'm so cool that I must have my very own outlet in the middle of the stationery section, right by the fiction section, wedding section, and quill/ink bottle display thing.

And then of COURSE Mum has to whip out this stack of pictures and give it to Vince. So he saw me as a Rugrat, which was kind of okay, since I don't think he holds it against me. All I can say is, I'm glad I'm not nearly so pudgey as I was as a childling. Though, I did look much happier back then.

I open up my window for Chemistry, all while listening to A Very Potter Musical with Vince, singing it all and dancing about. Because obviously we're cool like that.

HO SHAT. Sorry, the house settled/cracked and I swear the ceiling was going to cave in.

Anyway, we tried Chemistry. Maybe for half an hour. Neither of us had a clue, so Vince pulled out the Magical Decision Dime and threw it into the Magical Empty Weird Tiny Plastic Cup and spun it about. And the Magical Decision Dime chose my answers for me. What did I get?

Actually, I'm not sure. Let me check.

An 82. A B. Wow, saying that is weird. But still! I got a B for random guesses. Now, if only I could have as much luck all the time.

Eventually we gave up because the lessons were so boring and unclear that even Vince, Mr. I-got-a-130-something-percent-in-Chemistry-back-in-my-day, didn't understand it. It IS online, so it's not like we could really ask an active teacher any questions.

So, we gave up and headed to Hot Topic. Of course, there's nothing new, and we didn't have any pot of gold or anything, so we didn't buy anything. Some videos and pictures inside and out of Hot Topic were taken. We basically played with store merch and moved on to going to Target, where Vince got slightly sweetened tea. BLEH. Tea. Bleh.

..Tea.

BLEH.

Only then, Mum had to go eat. So we dashed (or, strolled, er.. yeah.. strolled..) back to Barnes and Noble so I could grab my bag (with Mr. Toptop). What did we do after that? I'm not sure.

All I know is that we did a BUNCH of random things. Vince made his bed in a freezer. We went to Sanrio to see if they had any more, er, spikes.. HALLO, I want gauges (not that Mum would let me, psh) as well as my labret. Sigh.

So that's where my safety pin went..

Anyway! We also walked aaaall the way to Round Table to discover we weren't really so hungry after all. I mean, I had already filled up on random-purple-flower-garlic--

Okay. That is a lie. But really, Vince told me it was safe. And I trust him. But I had nothing to drink in case after eating it my mouth tasted like.. like.. I dunno, bee fur.

Eventually we did make it BACK to Round Table and we split a Medium (with a capital M) pizza, pepperoni and olives versus plain ol' cheese. MWAHAHA. Again. The pizza wasn't much a good idea, though. Sunday, my tummy made me pay. BUT, I really enjoyed spending time with my brain twin. As well as Diana, but she can't be helped. Nor can Nymphie. Or any of the others.

Relationship Issues.

Ehh, so, as some (or two) of you may know, I'm a bit--well, mostly--mental. Or you can just call me a Cancer and be on with it. My perception is skewed crazily, and I don't forget emotional trauma of any kind (unless asked point-blank, which was unfortunate last autumn) and that can be quite a bugger when it comes to me being in a relationship.

I do thank Kai for putting up with it.

A couple nights ago, I finally broke down and told the plain truth; I am sick of anything and everything sexual being directed at him. Nyan, I know it's true that that makes up a good portion of conversation at uni. And I understand that. But still, oi! I can't help but to feel awkward and thoroughly upset whenever I hear or see it.

I try to be good. I don't want to end up as the horror story of a girlfriend everyone hates. The over-protective, overly-jealous and generally bitchy girlfriend that attempts to force everything from her happy bubble of a relationship. I purposely try to keep things to myself to avoid being like that. But then, that is what ended up killing me. Along with family issues, and basically being on the run, these feelings shredded my spirit at the end of last year, and fragments are still caught up in me.

It sucks.

But now that I've been honest, now that I've confessed this to Kai, now that I'm BLOGGING about it (which I may regret later), I think the shredded and darkened parts of me will start to go away. Only happiness for the future. And that makes the whole world seem brighter.

Screnzy.

Script Frenzy is only days from being over. If today is the 21st, all Script Frenzy participants have 9 days to be at 100 pages. How many pages should everyone have right now? Around 67 pages.

GUESS WHAT.

Blue is so behind, writing in at 23 pages.

Sure, it won't be easy to catch up. But still, I swear I shall win this one! It's a really great experience, to write a script. Being part in a challenge is fun, too. So, here is my challenge for the rest of the month: Writing around 9 pages per day. Face. Keyboard.

But I promised! I promised I'd finish! Actually accomplishing this.. would mean I'm no longer a failure at everything. Isn't that what everyone else is doing? Struggling (or working smartly) to prove they can finish something like this? In a month? It's pretty amazing.

By the by, my screenplay has evolved from Tunnels into Mindfuck. Yeah. Excuse the non-French.

Psychological Thriller? Whaa? YES.

Mental Issues.

What can I say? Symptoms of ADHD, depression, OCD, and various other things all mashed up in one head can be fun. But it is also.. weird.

And that is that!

School.

Less than a month now to finish my semester of Chemistry and last unit of English. Pressure? Yes. Stress? Yes. Have I tackled things like this before? Yes. Will I finish on time to graduate with the rest of the class (yes, the class I don't know at all whatsoever)? I'd better.

I am really looking forward to summer. Especially because a happy summer means that I've finished Chemistry and I won't need it again (I hope--even if it does come up, I hope not for a WHILE).

Also, I got an email from Ms. Lytle herself, congratulating me and such for my academic success and rewards and things of the like. That is really special. Crazy.

My Dad.

I have no idea why I feel the need to mention this.

Today, my phone went wonky and it said I had received a failed message from my dad, only, I was out of it, and I exited that screen. Bye bye, message. Later, I asked him to resend it, but he said he hadn't sent anything.

Wonderful.

So we were talking. This hasn't happened in.. how long, now? It has to have been at least a month. We talked a bit about what we are both currently doing, then a little bit about college. And then out of nowhere, he says he has to go to call back my brother. Okay then.

Is it true I'm having abandonment issues? Perhaps. I try not to think of it. There are already too many issues.

Lastly, Dick Clark.

Because who doesn't love Dick Clark?

He was adorable today. He looked all stoic (and not Matt's "stoic") while he was sitting on the bench on the porch, watching the storm come in.

Last.. er, last last night, I discovered Dick Clark enjoys playing with my old earphones. Only, not if Marilyn Manson or Lady GaGa is playing through them. He folds his ears all the way back. So far back.. I didn't even know cats' ears could go that far back.

Poor Dick Clark. He and his literal 'Fraidy Cat sister, Duchess, are getting old. They're around 12 years old right now! Looong life for two outside cats.

Dick Clark has some issues getting up. It's like he uses the momentum of bouncing several times back and forth to fling and twist himself up. It's quite sad, but rather cute at the same time.

He is as purry and drooly as usual. He enjoys talking, yawning, being pet (petted?) and long walks on the beach. Or, marina. Shh. He is quite the stud, Dick Clark. Very.. orangey. Very adorable.

Oi, so that was a huge load of possibly-depressing news. Sorry about that. Hopefully, soon, the blog will start to get brighter. Especially after I graduate (woo!), when I won't have Chemistry nagging me. Hehe.

Also, someone in me is extremely spiteful. Which means the fun is about to begin.

Love and other indoor sports (like poodle-shaving),

Blue Disastrous

::Quick, Now, Quick::

I feel really bad for doing this, but I'm going to have to delay what should have been today's post. Today, I did have an awesome day with my adopted Du'Pont twin, but I will have to write a much longer, much more detailed entry tomorrow.

I have been set off once again by the carelessness of someone close.

LOIS,

Blue Disastrous

::Mm, Brains, How Tasty..::

Welcome once again to Zombie Blue's blog. Thanks for reading.

Being a mostly-homeschooled childling, I have the freedom to do my work whenever, and the freedom to totally put everything off otherwise. Because I don't have specific times I MUST go do that important paper on Victorian Poetry, I have gotten my sleeping schedule WAY off track. Hence the zombie feeling. Yesterday/today I stayed up twenty-three hours, then took a nap for five and a half. Woo. Still, zombie-like.

So, updates. I have six books to ship out to people requesting them, and I'm waiting for mine. It is really odd, to me, that people like these types of books, but I suppose if my mum has bought them, other people out there can share that taste in books.

I am STILL shocked about my grants. I keep logging into CMS and looking at my Financial Aid page. I feel like I have Jobberknolls flapping about in my tummy. Is it silly to keep checking it? I doubt it would mysteriously vanish..

So, Mr. Toptop the blue laptop had an adventure today. He traveled in the car! On my lap in a small space, but I could tell he was excited. I mean, his battery life actually lasted a lot longer than it usually would.

I decided to go along with my mum and my uncle to his radiation appointment today for the first time, because my grandma had over her sister and an old friend. Eva, Delores and Gladys. Tell me those DON'T sound like stereotypical granny names. Anyway, they were chattering about and laughing like old hens, so, no thank you. I would rather sit out in a car for half an hour to an hour. Which is what Mum, Mr. Toptop and I did.

It was good, I got to write more to my screenplay freely without distraction from the internet. Maybe I should go to Borders or something more often, and not use their wireless internet. Though, books would probably snag me then. Darn. Coffee shop? I can wear all black (wow, such a stretch from what I usually wear, right?) and pretend to be one of those super cool people you see in the movies who appear so untouchable because of their awesomeness, but then they turn out to be the unfortunate, moody, misunderstood people whose lives are only full of bad things..

Um. No. I don't think so.

Anyway, I've written up to the first main point in my screenplay. Finally. It seems to have taken forever. But now is when I need to start really thinking, how can I build up the structure of the plot? How can I neaten it up, and make it have more impact? One thing I need for sure, though, is to know some ways a person can torture herself.

Oh, yeah. Writing this and not being scared? It'll be a ball.

Love and other indoor sports (oh, don't laugh),

Blue Disastrous

::I Need More Music::

Listening to the same 1246 songs gets pretty monotonous. And yes, I did just spend five minutes trying to remember the word "monotonous" due to another brain fail.

There hasn't been much to blog about lately, and that makes me sad. Sad because I am putting out blog entries that aren't quite worthwhile, and sad because my life is, unfortunately, so uneventful that the highlights of a day include finally finding a book to order and doing another unit in English. And that is definitely not okay.

So, today. First off, once more, I slept until around four. This is also not okay. Anyway, at least I woke up to good news. I got mail!

The reason this is so exciting is that I never get mail. I'm not signed up for any memberships at stores or responsible for paying bills or a receiver of magazines or anything, so all of my mail traffic is the occasional bank statement and--WAIT. Now, I am pretty sure I've explained this before. Brain fail two in a matter of eight minutes.

But this wasn't a bank statement telling me what I already know, or anything from my dad. This.. was the best news I've had in a while. My financial aid award letter.

I've received enough grants to pay for nearly the full total for my freshman year. I can't remember if I screamed or cried or was shocked into silence (it was probably some mixture of these) but this is.. amazing. Beyond that, even. I don't have to beg my dad for help, and I don't have to miss out on college altogether. This is.. the biggest thing that will happen, most likely, until graduation. Huge. Duh. Of course. I'm still shocked.

After that, I don't even know what I did until only a few hours ago. I am pretty sure I only sat staring at the piece of paper for a bit, while other things were happening in the background.

Also, my grandma went out to get another Old Lady Bouffant, also known as The Ridiculous Afro (in my head, at least), so Dick Clark came inside. Not just in my room, either, but in the living room. And he ate my mac n cheese, then rested awkwardly half-off my lap.

Okay, then. I just got off on a very different and passionate tangent. I saw, on a photo album of one of my friends', quite an argument. I clicked. The album was of five pictures, each one containing an emo-ish couple. The first picture, one was kissing the other's cheek. The second, the couple was kissing in the rain. Very classic and cute, and dynamic shot on the photography side of it. The third was two just standing close together. The fourth was an embrace, romantic. The fifth was a sketch of a couple kissing, with credits to someone's DevArt account. Okay. So, why the outrage?

Yep. You guessed it. They were gay couples.

(Er, well, the rain one, I couldn't quite tell if the shorter person is male or female.)

Um. Okay? CUTE and NOT OBSCENE pictures in an album these people didn't have to even click on? It just bothers me that the people who commented with such passionate rage said, "I don't hate gays," but that they didn't want to log into Facebook to see "a bunch of dudes making out." Er.. "(Not that I'm anti-gay.)"

I believe there is only one picture there of one couple of questionable sexuality kissing in the rain. There is no groping, no rubbing, no flying tongues. Nothing at all obscene. Nothing out of the realm of what straight couples normally post. Hell, these pictures were way conservative for what I've seen some of my friends post. If this album shouldn't have been posted, neither should any of straight couples.

Sorry about this tangent. It just really, really bothers me that people show so much hatred toward one group of people while smiling and putting up a front of, "I'm totally supportive!" Did we, as a country, not just get out of a period of time that was full of hatred for a group of people because they have a different shade of skin colour?

Just because of a stupid book..

ANYWAY. Woah. Totally went off again. My original idea, writing of some self-discoveries sparked by another of Sara's blog entries, is now seeming like a very, very bad idea. Too much negativity in one entry. Oi. Let me just say that I've got some more evaluation to do, and I have a lot of personal work to get done and even more issues to get through.

And I'm on page eleven of my screenplay.

Love and other indoor sports (like bashing in skulls, of course),

Blue Disastrous

::Also::

I am giving my permission to be sent off, given away, dumped in a trashcan or whatever else my dad was supposed to do at my wedding.

LOIS,

BD

::Again, Again, and Again::

OH WOW. I typed the title thinking of how I have been chronically staying up into the wee hours of the morning, and then I wanted to listen to music and the first song that comes up on shuffle?

Reread the title. One of my favourites. Ever. Blaqk Audio..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R4enda8_Dwc

Just go. Just go.

Hmm, so today was.. rather.. odd. It started off (kind of) around 9AM, when I attempted to wake up and failed. Quarter of an hour later, I attempted to wake up and failed. Lather, rinse, repeat. When did I actually get up, breaking this sleep spell? 4:13PM. I suppose sleeping a quarter shy of an hour in two days has finally taken its toll.

What the heck have I even been doing today? I honestly can remember nothing past Mum agreeing to let me sign up for Paperback Swap.

That is the highlight of today, really. I mean, I have had meaningful conversations, meaningless conversations, and worrisome conversations, but signing up for what will equal many books has outshone everything else. Mum pointed at two plastic crates full of books. She wants to rid of them.

They are listed on our PBS account. TWENTY-NINE BOOKS. That is exciting.

Also, current conversation.

After eavesdropping, a 31-year-old masochist teams up with David Bowie to save the world. says (1:30 AM):

lyn-z will be my maid of honour. but i will have.. no bridesmaids.

all my other friends are guys.

o_o

Vincent says (1:30 AM):

well, in all honesty, the way the world is right now, things like that have changed

After eavesdropping, a 31-year-old masochist teams up with David Bowie to save the world. says (1:31 AM):

would you like to wear a kilt?

xD

Vincent says (1:31 AM):

honestly, yah, i would do it

So. Um. Yeah.

Love and other indoor sports (中と上です),

Blue Disastrous

>:3

::Under the Influence!::

Not of drugs, though. Of colourful things. Of cute things. Of fluffy things.

And of books. And fabric. And baking. Oh my dog, I just may explode.

What happened today? Right! It is a Moonday. 月曜日。Yes, I did remember. That bit of Japanese should send a little hint--yes, waking up at 5:45am (after falling asleep around 5) to go to a class that absolutely messes with my mind! Yay! Japanese is pretty cool though. The class was going over particles. Of course, all of us girls already knew it all, and we were doodling on our whiteboards again and idly standing (sitting) by in case we were shot a question.

My whiteboard contained a llama, an invisible orange pink unicorn, a monstrous leech, all of katakana at least once, and a good (new) portion of my script.

And then I was asked a question.

「葵さん、上はなんですか。」

OH SHAT. I had just learned this with Kai. I literally did a face-desk. It really hurt, and it was really loud. Miyu, of course, giggled as usual. Takada-sensei asked if I was all right--as if I were an escaped hippopotamus with rabies wearing a tutu. So I had explained I had just learned all of these prepositional kanji two days ago. And then.. everyone went quiet. More quiet. Meh.

So now they think I'm a kitty-eared, pink-haired, Japanese-genius freak. It's an improvement.

Then a break. Lunch. Wanting to shoot myself after two--TWO--painstakingly long phone conversations with my grandma.

And then Music! Yay! Right?

Wrong. Apparently the school has decided to have a "talent showcase" and OF COURSE Mr. Courtright has made it known that this is mandatory for all of us in his class. WHAT?! What's worse yet, he just gave us sheet music today which we must master by the showcase on the 30th. Excuse me. No. I do not DO Hook's "Minuet", no matter how easy it is. Can't I do Perfectly Flawed? Why not?! Buu.

AAANYWAY, the positives:

+4 more pages of my screenplay today.

+Did not fall asleep in either class.

+Got a lot of compliments on my hair.

+Random urge to work on my ridiculous English course--finished a unit and then some.

So, say yay for the psychotic senior?

Hopefully I can go to the fabric store to make Dexter's neko mimi.

OH YEAH. I totally just remembered a large portion of my day I wanted to say here. So, I've written an 18 Before 18 list, and one of my goals is to read a book a week until then. But I've no money! And no (safe) library! So, I asked my old pal, Sedona, what I should do.

Oh, duh. Paperback Swap.

Double score: people have listed textbooks Kai and I are going to need next semester. For 1 Book Credit? Heck yes.

Love and other indoor sports (like plotting sweet, sweet revenge),

Blue Disastrous

::Irksome::

I apologise; I have been unnecessarily annoyed at just about everything today. I don't know why, particularly, but my mind has pretty much declared war on itself. I want one thing, but then it annoying because I want its opposite at the same time, which is annoying in itself, and this struggle continues.

It has kept me from doing anything productive, really, so I wish I had just gone to bed much earlier. Isn't that horrible? Oi, don't answer that.

Erm. What news is there? Dick Clark is sick. Again. So he's been laying on my bed nearly all day. A random French Canadian guy added me on Facebook. I gained another follower (which actually does make me happy!). Er.. I still have oodles of schoolwork to do, and the main part of that is Chemistry which I still hate with a burning passion. Hopefully I can pull it off in the end.

Er. Also. Now I really, really want a pet ferret. Too bad they are illegal to buy and own in California. But then, if I go to another state (that is not Hawaii)..

Now, I shall go. Either I shall sleep, or bake the brownies I want. Either way, it is what it is.

LOIS,

Blue Disastrous

::Another Perfect Day::

Well, maybe not absolutely perfect, but pretty close. I spent the day with Kai, mostly in his dorm. Little bit in the lobby.

Meh. It was a really lazy day. First thing we do when I arrive? Sleep. Nine thirty is too early for us night owls. Anyway, we spent some of the time after waking up just laying and randomly.. being us. Which included totally ignoring his stupid さろ roommate who forgot his stupid key and banged on the stupid door for ten minutes straight.

Our story: we were asleep. Yeah. I promise.

Anyway, the day was spent making my blue/black mill deck better, learning some kanji (almost none of which I even remember now) and being totally pissed and therefore writing another two pages to my screenplay by texting it to my email while I was in the place.. situation.. whatever it was that was sucking the happy right out of me.

ENCOURAGE, please.

So now I.. am writing. Yay, I've reached all of.. six pages. So lame. But at least I'm filling out the plot and adding ideas in, thanks to Vince. And it's funny, because I've been talking of killing off characters in my screenplay but.. it wouldn't really apply to my script with current changes. So. I will stick to killing them off in my mind!

Yeah, Blue, that doesn't sound psycho at all..

Also, new music. That's all.

Love and other indoor sports (like balancing four awkward drinks in awkward bottles),

Blue Disastrous

P.S. I have had the craving for a jar of baby food all day. Strawberry banana applesauce. WHY?!

::Newness!::

Such a fun word. Well, if you've clicked the link to this post or you're just tuning in--you can see I've done some remodeling. Like the new layout, widgets, and music? Oh, I do.
Unfortunately, this is all I have for tonight/this morning. I'm supposed to wake up in four or so hours to go see Kai. Eep!

LOIS,
Blue Disastrous

::And Now, My Day::

All righty then! After totally ranting forever, I feel mostly better. So, that's good.

A quick blog-update, about the actual technical and not-content stuff, I am working out a custom layout, getting music to put up, tabs linking to other relevant things, possible "theme" entries (as lame as that sounds), and other cool things like that. I'm pretty excited about that.

Also, my graduation party-planning is SO underway. That's pretty exciting too. Now, if only I could get Via Coma to respond.. Cough.

Anyway! Today--well, yesterday now, so Thursday, yep, Thursday, okay, that's all settled--I woke up at 7:30 AM (a HUGE surprise, like eight hours early for me, right?) with intent to meet Matt at the BART at 10. Well, we were all some random number of minutes late, but that didn't make much difference. We were going to Japantown, after all.

ALL ALONE.

I know, I'm shocked too. Of course, I still got the whole list of things NOT to do; don't make eye contact, don't sit by shady people on the BART, don't talk about money, don't talk to any seedy-looking people, don't you DARE take your sweatshirt off, Brittany Rose, I will NOT have you showing your belly--in my defense, it perfectly covers my belly.. if I keep pulling it down during the day. But I wear a jacket anyway. Ah, times.

So we were off, Tiger and I. We were bubbly excited. I took off my kitty hat and got a few looks from people--oi, my head had just exploded in pink. Anyway, we brushed up on our Japanese on the way. We failed to hold our breath going under the tunnels (come on, there were stops IN the tunnels). Mostly we caught up, and people-watched with our sharks, Jessie and James. Meowth is missing, again, by the by.

We got off at Powell Street. Phase One--done. Only, we got slightly side-tracked by the mall. Well, I sort of dragged him in. But, it's so.. nine-story-y! It is awesome. We took some pictures (which I am too lazy to upload, nyan, nyan) and left. Phase Two was in progress.

Japantown, I estimate, is only a bit over a mile from the Powell Street BART stop. Maybe.. Let me check. One point six miles. That didn't seem so far to us. And why would we want to waste a good dollar or so on bus fare when we could walk? After all, buses smell and have weird people and stopped at random places. Surely we'd get lost. Plus, it's so.. unsanitary!!

Anyway. An hour and a half of straight climbing up gigantic hills, we were sweaty, tired, and SO relieved to see the little waving Japantown flags. We were there!

Phase Three--mall. And then began our exploring. We had a three-hour time limit, unfortunately, but it was okay. We went to nearly every shop; the kimono shop, stationery shops, furniture shops, and a lot of candy shops, trinket shops, and oh-my-goodness delicious-smelling inscence shops. Matt had to stop our excursion for one of his beloved lychee pearl drinks. Blechk.

And then we realised--oh, shat! We had forty minutes to eat and start heading back. So, still a bit of time, but not much. We popped into the other side of the mall. There weren't many shops we were interested in--only one, actually. A little supermarket. It was adorable, as were the Japanese people who were (duh) fluently speaking in Japanese amongst themselves. We were so jealous.

Then, right as we walked out, to the right, we found the perfect restaurant. Phase Four. A sushi bar. Finally, I was getting my beloved sushi. Sake (salmon) nagiri. YUM. Matt got shrimp tempura (shouldn't it be tenpura, in Japanese?) and some sort of weird sushi.. Anyway, it was delicious. All washed down with oodles of soy sauce and two Cokes. The ice cubes, I feel I must mention, were ADORABLE. They were like, PERFECT small cubes, about the size of.. erm.. my keyboard keys! Yeah! And they were completely clear. It was awesome.

Except then, somehow, a small dollop of undiluted wasabi got into my sushi. I didn't know this. I ate the whole thing. This was my first--and hopefully LAST--experience with wasabi. My head nearly exploded. Spicy and I don't mix. At all.

So, after that whole ordeal (そおいしいでした！) we went back to the supermarket. I had been craving some MOUSE (actually small, cocoa-dusted chocolate mousse squares by Meltyblend, OOH I DO recommend them) all day, so I had to get some. Also, a bento box, which is priced as 3.80$ on Jbox, but was 1.50$ at the supermarket. I could have so bought two. My bento collection is happily growing. It's rather exciting.

Anyway, after that, we went across the street and popped into a store dedicated to origami. NYAN. All the paper was so pretty. It made me wish I could fold something other than stars and weird stackable claw-beak things. They didn't even had any star paper! Or, maybe we just didn't see any. It wasn't on my mind at the time.

We found a sign outside that had a kitty and, duh, said, "ねこ" and it was so cute. Obviously I had to take a picture with it. But then--

HO SHAT!

We had to go back. Into Phase Five. Going back. And, of course, going back was all uphill too. Sigh. But then we hit the peak of the hill, and it was basically running all the way down. We made it back in half an hour! That's better than my P.E. mile time. Really!

So then, Phase Six--wandering. We went back into the nine-story mall. People-watched. Hot Topic to scan ze card. Then out to get a cup-bowl-cone of frozen yogurt, which I had to slurp and get a brain freeze, noticing we were late.

Phase Seven--BART again. We were going home.

Today was an exciting adventure. Except the part of fearing for our lives walking to Japantown and back. But hey! It was a great experience. I hope this happens again sometime soon. And we WILL speak Japanese.. We WILL!!

Love and other indoor sports (like doing the wasabi-dance),

Blue Disastrous

::Okay. It's TIME::

It is time for my rant about children. It just so happened that, again, I was thinking of a topic to blog about, and decided to check the other updated blogs and it just so happened that the lovely Sara had written an entry on the same topic here.

CHILDREN.

Yes, I did say that. What is wrong with America, this generation? Why is society crumbling away into a mess of crime and disrespect, with no morals and laws to protect us from protecting ourselves?

Children.

I know I am barely out of childhood, so hush. But at least I'm not one of my peers, who smokes, drinks, does drugs, parties all night, sleeps around, and behaves generally idiotic every waking second of her miserable and nearly pointless life. Maybe that is a bit of an exaggeration; after all, not every American teen is like that.

But really, now, we've gotten terrible. There are cases such as the examples used in Sara's post, in which (early) teens are discriminated against, beaten into a coma, and forced to resort to killing themselves because the bullying has gotten that terrible.

Why do the figures of authority not try to help these kids? Why is no one bothering to help?

It is starting early on now, in the twos and threes, when children are just learning how to put coherent sentences together. Children are now growing up with a television as a full-time nanny, while their parents are out partying, or ignoring their responsibilities, or just not caring. Actually, I'll take that back. Let's say these parents do care about their children. They care, but they don't bother to actually parent.

Now, I'm not saying every parent in America is bad. There are some truly great ones out there, with children who will grow into amazing people. There are also children who will grow up well in spite of their bad experiences with their parent(s). But this is not quite my point.

All right. So, let's take a trip into this scary land of parenting--which I have never experienced, and hope not to for at least another ten years. So, there you go. You've had a baby. Congratulations, it's a boy. Now what?

Well, now you've got a baby on your hands. A baby who will begin to learn to talk, walk and act according to what he sees--and what he is allowed to get away with. Okay, so little Johnny spilled his mac n cheese on the floor and laughed. Maybe it was an accident. You give him new food. He does it again, and laughs. So now it's a joke. Maybe, just laugh it off. He's only playing.

But then, those two incidents turn into ten, forty, one hundred meals splattered on the floors, the walls, and Fluffy the cat. And why have you not stopped this yet?

Take a step back. Little Johnny is learning to talk. It's kind of cute, but you know, you may not have a lot of time to put into this whole teaching thing. You turn on the TV, like every evening. Some reality show about rich brats in Orange County. Meh, okay. It's usual.

The next morning, little Johnny fails to address you as "Mommy/Daddy". No, this morning, he demands, "Food, bitch!" Oh, my. Maybe that wasn't what you thought it was.. No, it may have been the TV (the one that is still on, by the way), or maybe he was just babbling. Certainly he doesn't know what this word means. You get him some food.

Only, this too turns into a hundred incidents. You shrug it off. Surely he must know it is impolite, and he is only playing because he is only a baby.

The same exact pattern plays for a majority of his baby behaviours. He screams when he's not happy. Appease him, then he will be quiet. Until next time. He runs around the house, and accidentally knocks a lamp over. But then, what does he care? He shrugs his toddler shoulders and runs off again, knowing you'll just clean up his messes. Isn't that what you always do?

This child you've just raised is the child that will run around stores screaming his head off, pushing down other kids at the playground to get a swing, or even hitting people. I mean, really? Raising a child with little to no discipline? Who does that help?

Certainly not yourself. You're the one who has to, again and again, clean up his messes. It may have been mac n cheese that first time, but what about when he's sixteen or seventeen, coming home escorted by police because he was caught tagging the school?

Mostly, you're certainly not helping him. He will grow up thinking he can order people around, or hit, or throw a tantrum with no consequence. He could end up the bully at the school, beating one of his peers because of some stupid fight over texting. Or, even worse, he could end up with a group that gets him into drugs. Or, he could end up fathering a child of his own way too early.

Of course, that was an extreme situation. There are some kids who have grown up with no discipline who have had to learn the hard way that these actions will lead them down the wrong path--something as small as not being able to go out to recess as a child, or maybe something later as an early teen, such as being busted at a party serving alcohol to minors. Again, more extreme cases.

But we hear these sorts of sad things all the time. It's always in the news. More school bullies beating their victims within an inch of death, more property damage by aimless teens, more rape.. and the young adults as well. It's hard to miss on the news, living in the Bay Area, a murder committed by someone barely legal, or a pair of them on the loose, armed. These kinds of people are the ones who make other parents, the good parents, afraid to let their own children go out of the house. These people are infringing on our rights as Americans. I want to be free, as we have all been promised. Don't you? But how far can we take that if we're even afraid to walk to the convenience store three blocks down the street?

Wow, this blog that started as a rant about bad parenting has turned into.. this. It's crazy.

So, what can new parents do to prevent this? The first thing I'd say a parent can do is love his or her child enough to discipline the child. No, it doesn't mean giving them the belt if they throw a tantrum. (Though, that happened a lot in future generations, didn't it? And it seems to have worked!)

Letting little Johnny know that knocking over his food, or screaming, or breaking furniture is not acceptable is absolutely going in the right direction. Children are, obviously, young and impressionable. They will get the message that certain behaviours are not tolerated. And then they will act accordingly.

Also, a great idea is to NOT let trashy TV parent your child. If anything, it can serve as an educational tool, or a bit of entertainment--clean entertainment. And not even that much. Children should not be inside with the TV all day! Or at--ugh, this is so wrong--their own laptops, or using their own cell phones. First, HELLO, children should not be allowed to have cell phones! They are CHILDREN, who are they going to call?

But secondly, the more important bit; why should children be inside watching TV when they can be outside, exploring the world they've been brought into? Er, safely, of course, as I've already ranted about those totally unfair evil people who make cities unsafe. But still. Outside. Surroundings. Friends. Playing, learning, laughing, growing as happy, bubbly children as they should. Is that too much to ask?

When little Johnny understands it isn't good to be the bad kid, little Johnny can start having fun in life. I was just that age a bit over ten years ago! I remember it! Having sleepovers with my friends, catching ladybugs, baking with my mum, "camping" out on the lawn.. I'm certainly glad my parents didn't allow me to be shut into a room with a TV talking at me. I'm glad I got to experience childhood as I should have--erm, just forget the divorce, shh!--heck, I'm even grateful I got those, what, two spankings for bad behaviour? Just getting "the look" from my mum or dad stopped anything bad straight in its tracks. As a little kid, you don't want to disappoint your parents. Or, at least, you shouldn't.

So, what are my main points here?

+Discipline. Let them know bad behaviour is not tolerated.

+TV isn't a nanny.

+Inject them full of love. There has to be a balance for all this spanking/"the look"-ing business.

+Nothing is more important than parenting your child. Not your rocky relationships, not your work, nothing.

+PLEASE don't assume your child knows how to behave well and is choosing to act like a brat. Chances are, little Johnny has been allowed to act this way by YOU.

Erm. Yeah. I should also add in some stuff about helping them become well-rounded little people, not with food but with experiences, and to get involved and all that jazz, but really, I'm getting tired of ranting and I now feel OODLES better getting this all out.

And now I am at a total loss for words. It's turning into NaNoWriMo all over again! Ahh!

Love and other indoor sports (like PARENTING),

Blue Disastrous

::Prime Suspect!::

Watching Family Feud has never been so fun.

What a lie.

So hey, I'm climbing up in entries. Finally I'm at a good number again, this being number 135. What have I revealed in so many posts? Not much actually. Reading so many different blogs has opened up a lot of ideas, some of which I shall silently admire, and some of which I shall try. I should have news about this out pretty soon; I have some things stewing in my mind.

Day two, no, three of eating an overload of sugar. Still loving it. Eating all this chocolate is making me drink practically my weight in water (as that is what goes best with chocolate, duh) so.. That balances out the bad, right? Not quite. But it's delicious! Buu. I'm sure there are millions of parents out there dealing with their small children bouncing off the walls (and furniture and ceiling and pets..) and wishing Easter had never come. Oops.

Family Feud, again: "GOOD ANSWER, GOOD ANSWER--" until the X smacks them down. Isn't that great? Crushing the hopes and dreams of millions.. or at least that family. Fail.

Sadly, I have nothing else to say for now. I shall be back!

Love and other indoor sports (it's wabbit season--chocolate wabbit),

Blue Disastrous

::Thank POODLES::

FINALLY I have caught up on blogs. It has taken that long to get through all the entries to all the blogs I have subscribed to from that one random.. one-week period? Er, the time when I was away from Blogger for a while. Yeah.

But no, I am not the type to just skip over all those entries. I won't ignore the all the work put into blogging, because obviously I blog too, and it means a lot to me when people take the time to read. (Though I'm not sure why, I don't say anything so interesting..)

You know what I find interesting? When I take a break to go to the bathroom, as I am unfortunately a human, and I get back to about six messages with a couple asking where I've gone. I was only gone a minute! Honestly.. Yes, I do love my people. Which is why I'm known for texting back immediately. Weirdness.

Happy Zombie Cria Day! Yesterday, that is. Was. Of course I am sitting here eating my purple Peeps (one has a random eye on its head) and dark chocolate and all. But also, I am enjoying my bright hair.

I would post a picture, but I want to wait for something better than what I currently have. So ha. But it is extremely similar to Jeffree Star's.

..Oh.. my.. dog.. I totally refreshed my Blogger homepage to find a bunch of new entries. Lovely! I shall read them now.

*Later*

So, I read them. Do I regret it? Yes and no. One particular entry brought up an old issue and while I do think of it often, I do shove it aside and purposely forget it. Now I am not. But moving on.

Saturday was fun. Vince and I walked a long way, first stopping at a field over overgrown bushes and yellow flowers. It was pretty cool, but I was kind of afraid a random creature would pop out and eat me. So on we went, until we got to that one side of Schulte, with the ditch with a "creek" and all those trees and whatnot. Turns out, there were no dead bodies. I was shocked.

We spent a few hours there, experimenting with what I will call "photo art". We both semi-failed, but we did get some good shots out of it.

Anyway, we ended up taking off to the mall when two raccoons scared the artistic vision out of me. So, to the mall! To Hot Topic! To Best Buy! To the World Market!

Only, Mum and Grandma were there. We were not supposed to go anywhere they were, as they were getting Easter surprises. We snuck around like creeps. Vince ended up getting tea (which smelled nasty; I forced him to stay away a bit because it was so bad), and then we decided to leave. Only, Mum was near the entrance. For sure we were going to get caught. So we crouched down, weaving in and out of displays, and darted out the door. Only one of the ladies at the counter saw us.

Right outside we were stopped. Ho. Shat. Before she could say anything, we both started half-shouting, "We didn't steal anything! We didn't steal! We have nothing! We were trying to not be seen by someone! We don't have anything! We didn't steal!" Things like that. Vince even offered we turn out our pockets. Like Snape. Or something.

But then the lady says, "No, I just wanted to know what you got." Gesturing to his tea. Sure, lady. I'm sure that's exactly what you wanted to know. Two dark teens darting out of a store, suspiciously glancing over their shoulders to see if they were being caught (by Mum)? Sure, lady.

Yesterday was interesting. I woke up at a somewhat-normal time. But of course, I immediately felt ridiculously sick, and I fell asleep on the couch right after looking through my Easter basket. Which was awesome, by the way. Stuffed full of socks, dark chocolate, purple Peeps, my traditional Long Ears chocolate bunny, a dark bunny, and my own set of adorable ceramic measuring spoons. And a llama! Another for my family of llamas.

I woke up later to find my Aunt Connie and Erica had just arrived. Yes, I know saying "my Aunt Connie.." should be grammatically incorrect. But I mean they are MINE, so ha. Not just a general "this is my aunt, this is my cousin". Meh, whatever, now I'm just rambling.

Very shortly after, I took a shower while Erica gave everyone haircuts. Then it was my turn. The whole day was consumed by hair stuff, catching up, and watching the Blindside while eating dinner. All in all, a good day. And yes, I am eating the leftovers now! Delicious, tender pork.. Oh! Yum!

It is now five days into Script Frenzy, and I am still on page three. Today, I am supposed to be on page seventeen to be on track. Well, ha! Take that, goal! I am going to feign failure, and come out victorious after all!

Well, I can only hope.

Still, deaths, car crash, Lulu, abusive father, mental scars.. Nearly to the first mention of Adrienne hearing a guiding voice. The story is totally taking on a life of its own, and it is way warped from my original nightmare. It is truly amazing.

As well as the human mind. That is all I shall say about that.

As of now (well, when I post this entry), I shall be whoring my blog. Who wants to follow, ne?

Love and other indoor sports (like.. Paso Doble?),

Blue Disastrous

::Another Day::

This has been a week or so of me being ridiculously sick. And it is just that--ridiculous.

Last night I got absolutely no sleep due to being freezing with a mild fever, nausea, headache, and just about every part of my body cramping up from the cold. And yes, I did have three blankets and an additional electric one on. Stupid.

I did get sleep, though. After three. I was waiting for Mum so I could buy.. Mayhem tickets! I'm really excited. Hopefully Kai likes his birthday gift, nyan?

Anyway. I woke up around.. nine? Ate a small dinner. Wrote two more pages on my screenplay. Now I am only six pages behind. Woo! I'll catch up.

My main stopping point was where my stopping point always is--the first time a character's name is brought up.

After hours of consideration, I decided my heroine is Adrienne, her fiance is Will, and her nearly irrelevant white rabbit is (was) Lulu. Only the first two are important, though.

So far, I think it has a lot of impact.. It even sort of freaks me out. I am reliving a cauchemar, after all. Hehehe. I like that word better than "nightmare".

Anyway. Four pages, two deaths, a car crash, two flash backs and an abusive father. Four pages. One of which doesn't even really count.

So you decide.

Anyway, I just finished my ice cream and I am TIRED. So goodnight.

Love and other indoor sports (like, maybe a typing race?),

Blue Disastrous

::Fail.::

That's right. DevianTART has changed everyone's avatar to Team Edward, Jacob, Gaga, and Seeker (no, not a cool Harry Potter Seeker, one of the stupid "seekers" from Twilight).

Sigh. Joking aside, today is the first day of Screnzy.

..AND I'M ALREADY BEHIND.

Of course. I'm only on page one.. of three. Three! Three and a third pages are all that is needed per day in order to reach the goal of one hundred pages. I'll make it up tomorrow, I swear..

Today it really sunk in (well, to my mum, really) that I will be graduating in a couple of months. So what does mum do? Calls the Super Team of us Brown women (and Wray, shh!) to start planning a party. Cake!! I've asked Via Coma to come play, and grab some food and such, so we'll see about that. Also, I have made my list and I'm checking it twice.. I am Sandy Paws, after all. I hope it will turn out to be a somewhat-non-boring party. I know nothing about parties.

Hm. I am very excited. First off, I've plans, and that never happens!! Er, actually, I've said that for the past few months and life is proving me wrong, so I'll keep on saying it.

Anyway. Slight chance of seeing Vince again for a test, and for.. awesomeness. Duh. Twin vibe.

Possible chance at maybe seeing my Fetus Buddeh?

Sunday, my cousin and aunt are coming over, and I'm getting bleach and colour, FINALLY!!

And then will come working hard on schoolwork and my screenplay and seeing Kai and somehow fitting sewing in somewhere.

Also, I like bananas.

And questionable Chinese food. And now I must change rooms.

--

THAT took a VERY long time. Forty minutes. But I did other stuff as well. Random stuff. Like noticing the towel on the real rack smells like my cat after rain (not awful, no matter how bad it sounds). And taking my measurements.

I'VE SHRUNK.

Before::36-27-36

Currently::34-26-33

How'd that happen?! However, I like it. Now, if only to get those numbers nice and even.. Almost there. And don't call me crazy! I'm not complaining. Just want to shape up. And do it well. So ha.

Anyway, I think it is time to get back to writing Tunnels. Which is the official unofficial title. Now it is technically "tomorrow", so now I've got to get to six and two-thirds pages before next midnight strikes.

Wish me luck.

Love and other indoor sports (like bed-dancing),

Blue Disastrous

P.S. Bed-dancing is not the same as the aforementioned "Love".

P.P.S Kai still hasn't written since he's been back.

P.P.P.S. This makes me a very sad kitty.

P.P.P.P.S. Also, I've been awarded a Cal Grant and I can't believe I didn't mention it!!

P.P.P.P.P.S. Apparently I like the whole "P.S." thing.